E is for Exercise! And er, E-Bay.

If you've read my earlier post 'The Dirty Word', you'll already know what I think about exercise. Not a great fan. Cleaning the beach worked well for the winter months, but now it's summer (or should I say 'rumoured' to be summer) there's really not much to do. The council employs cleaners from May to September, so the place looks nice for holiday-makers; which would be wonderful if there were any, but the summer has been so 'pants' that every one's beggared off to Spain.

But fret not! I'm not sitting idle! Not me! I have found a new and very effective way to raise my pulse and it's available to anyone with access to a computer. All you have to do is go to the E-Bay site. Then you look in 'Automotive'. Next, find the cars for sale and bid on one. Finally- win the auction! That's it, that's all you need to do. Heart rate will triple instantly, sweat glands will work overtime, and you'll enjoy even more exertion by feverishly clutching your credit card uttering the words: 'What have I done?' while hitting the 'back' button.

I don't know why I did it. Having been without a car since December, (quite happily, I may add), I suddenly decided I couldn't live another minute without one, for reasons I can't quite recall now. Was it that I felt unnerved by the amount of extra cash I had in my pocket every week? Maybe I hankered after the fight for parking spots in this incredibly crowded island. Or possibly I missed the thrill of being to pushed off the road by some yob in a 4x4. Who knows? It's certainly not for the joy of motoring.

Whatever the reason, I am now the somewhat startled owner of a turquoise Honda. When my neighbour saw it, he ran to get his sunglasses, cheeky bar-steward. I think it looks rather festive. Here it is!